Silence Becomes Song

                                            Crane photo taken by Ryan Tarrant while in Japan

Silence Becomes Song

Sometimes

            you just need solitude;

to sit

            in the silence and think

or not.

Embrace

                the emptiness within;

which is

                fullness shrouded in dark

disguise.               

Remain

                without rushing reason;

choosing

                to confine chaos through

calmness.

               

Linger

                until Light rims the night;

anxious

                silence becomes soul’s song

of praise.

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Hello everyone! I know it has been quite a while since I have posted anything. The last few months have been a bit hectic for me with everything from the loss of two people I loved, celebrating the holidays, preparing for and co-hosting my parents’ 50^th wedding anniversary party, helping to pack and move my son two hours away and then dealing with the mixed emotions of adjusting to the transition. . .which is still ongoing. 

It seems lately there has been constant chaos! I reached a point I wanted to cry out, “Stop the world and let me off!!!”  The desire to escape the madness of the moment has been felt by all of us. Songs have been written about it. Much more eloquent poems than mine have been penned with the exact same sentiment. But, after the pandemonium of the past few months - and as I try to adapt to this newest, “empty nest” phase of my life - the longing to just have time to sit in the quiet and think has been overwhelming. Not the sit in front of the TV, zoning out reality recluse type of alone time. Instead, I have needed more of a soul-searching, who am I now solitude. 

You know, reinventing yourself or simply seeing yourself in a new light is not as easy as it might seem. With the somewhat "empty nest" has come an emptiness within. I feel hollow inside, as if a part of me moved out with my son and I will never get it back again. I am thrilled for him and for his new life; for the new adventures he will encounter. I trust him totally into God's hands and know he will do well. But, for myself. . . 

Thankfully, I can say that things are beginning to slow down a bit and a new “normal” has begun to settle over my household. Not, a new normal that I am fond of yet, but such is life – it changes and we grow stronger from the changes. As I always do when my emotions are on a roller coaster ride, I have picked up my pen once again to attempt to sort through my sentiments. 

And so. . . .I sit in the solitude, in the silence and search; until God meets me in my darkness and embraces me with His arms of love. I do not know what the Lord has in store for me next; but I offer myself up to Him as a willing servant. My prayer has always been and continues to be, "Use me, Lord, as You best see fit." 

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Precious Lord, 

Thank You that even in my solitude, I am never alone. You are beside me always. I must only seek You to find You. I am Yours forever! Amen.